The Malteaser’s tale

My apologies for the lack of posts of late! I have a whole stack of subjects that I'm hopefully going to trot out in the near future. For now I have a little story that the Malteaser recently shared with me about a business trip.

Whilst travelling with one of his heads of department, who is Romanian, in her car, but with him driving, the Malteaser was pulled over by the police. Not aware that he had committed any kind of offence, he calmly pulled over and produced his driving licence. His colleague did the talking and it turned out that his heinous crime was that of driving, in daylight, without his headlights on. Obviously this awful law-breaking could not go unpunished so the police officer wrote down his name (luckily for the Malteaser just his two Christian names) and informed him (via his interpreter) that he was going to be prosecuted.

Despite repeated pleas and arguments the officer seemed hellbent on making an example of the Malteaser. There was a brief round of Gallic shrugging before his Romanian counterpart decided on a different tack. As fortune would have it, the police officer in question, along with his colleague, had been whiling away his time in their stationary vehicle by drinking. So the Malteaser's plucky right-hand woman offered the law-enforcers a little bribe;

• "Perhaps you'd be interested to know that I have a case of wine in the boot," she proffered.
  
• "Hmm, you'd have to speak to my boss about that," replied the polițist, hesitantly.
  
• "It's French wine".
  
• "Oh no. We don't want that!
  
• "Well, what I meant was it was made by French producers in Romania.
  
• "Oh, well if it's Romanian wine...."
  

So, it seems that silence can be bought – but only if the goods are top quality. Don't even think about offering something as shoddy as French wine.

And that's how a Frenchman gets evades the law in this country.